I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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