I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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