i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
