How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
