...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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