Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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