i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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