I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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