Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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