considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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