I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
you're hired as official boob wrangler
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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