windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize