yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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