Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
being pregnant is like rehab
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
