I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
