Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
God I need to hump something, right now.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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