If i come over, it means nothing
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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