You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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