I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
