Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
