wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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