Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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