Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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