What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
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