my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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