I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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