...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
