pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
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