i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
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