Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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