I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i barfeds in our rink
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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