I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
