Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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