No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
