I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
