I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
