i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
