Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize