i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
it's great music for shaving your balls
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
