Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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