Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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