Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
