can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
