Your face is a jimmy john
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I need moral support for this bender
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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