Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
