I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
