wake up i wanna do it froggy style
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
this hospital has no fireball
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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