I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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