You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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