PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
