I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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