All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
